December 6
What are they thinking?…sometimes I seem to care more about whether you are happy with me than whether I am happy with me. I have a sister who just doesn’t feel compelled to explain her food choices. It is so interesting to observe. If she doesn’t want it, she simply and politely says “No thanks.” There are often plenty of polite ways to turn foods down if I really don’t want to have them, ways to say no without hurting someone’s feelings.
I could say, “I am too full on your other delicious food right now”. I could say, “I would love to take a piece home instead”. I could even fib a bit and say that one of the ingredients doesn’t agree with me (however, I have to remember this for future reference, and remembering anything these days isn’t reliable!). I can tell the truth (for me), and say that I can’t eat it reasonably or that I don’t want to get started on it because I will be preoccupied with it for the rest of the night, stealing pieces when I think no one is looking. I can take the hostess (or someone else) aside in advance and enlist their support. Just depends on my relationship with that person.
I have an unhealthy tendency to care what others think more than how I feel, though now I can usually identify when my need to pass it up is more important than my need to have you approve of me. Without doing it at someone else’s expense, I want to honor how I feel about eating something. My good friends understand and my aquaintances…well I am not as concerned with how they feel about me.
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