July 9
The food industry knows that we are easy targets. Read Kessler’s book The End Of Overeating. Want to know the simplist but most effective tool they use in the myriad of ways they help us to eat more? They simply give us more! Rocket science, huh? Adding sugar can be counted upon also to bring about greater consumption every time. They also make food softer so that we don’t have to chew it all that much. For most fast food, you wouldn’t even need teeth; you could just gum it. Why? So we will eat faster and eat more. Why waste time chewing for gosh sakes – which would have signaled the appetite mechanisms in your brain to help bring about satiety?
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Back when I was in college, stiduyng for my Masters (2002) in counseling, I wrote a paper on BED. In 2005, while doing some individual research work (yep, Im a big research nerd), I had this ah-ha moment Im a binge eater. Now, I have struggled with my weight for many many years, but even though I was always just a bit overweight, I was still healthy, active. etc. And It wasnt until 2005, after the birth of my 2nd child that things went downhill for me. In 2005, I gave birth to my 2nd daughter. She was born 2 months prematurely due to placental abruption. It was a horrific experience. It was then that I was diagnosed with post partum depression and post traumatic stress disorder. My weight went up and up and up. Kept going up and has continued to go up . Also, in 2005, just months after she was born, I became extremely ill.. constant nausea, abdominal pain, etc. It was some sort of mystery illness. but with each new doctor I saw, they prescribed more meds, changed meds, did this, that and the other. I have had so many surgeries since then that I have had 1 or 2 a year. They have removed organs, scar tissue, explored, etc. And the latest diagnosis is IBS. Anyways, over the course of these years, I began binge eating. I would eat my normal 3 meals a day. I ate snacks when the kids did, I ate what they didnt finish on their plates (after all, who likes to waste food when so many out there are hungry?), I ate in between these meals and snacks. I ate while cooking. I ate while doing dishes. I have a secret stash of food (mainly sweets-chocolate, and salty crunchy snacks). I eat when Im out of the house. I eat when no one’s looking, especially my husband. And then when I notice Im gaining more weight, I get depressed, angry with myself and guess what I do? I eat some more. I feel guilty when I do all this other eating and sneaking and guess what? eat some more. I havent worn shorts in 7 years.. and want to..and it does get hot here in alabama, 6 months out of the year to be exact. My kids want to go to the beach. But I have this horrible fear of the beach. Back about 4 years ago, we went to the beach , took the kids and a picnic lunch. We all had on shorts and tee shirts. No bathing suits as we had not planned on taking the kids in to the water. But as we were walking on the beach, 4 girls/ladies were laying there on their towels, music playing, each smoking a cigarette and drinking a beer, loudly and rudely says as we walk by, OMG, look how fat she is . and one woman says to the rest if i ever get that big, i want you to shoot me . she should be ashamed of herself she is super fat my 3 year old, who doesnt forget anything, talks about that time, each time the beach is mentioned. She tells me when other people say that her mommy is fat. And I am fat. Im severely fat. Im 299 lbs at the present time. but was up to 315 , my highest weight. I need to exercise. And I am active. I do go for walks. I do clean the house, do yard work, play with the kids. Im not considered a lazy person (as most people think when they see an obese person, that’s the first thing that pops in to their head, LAZY). I could go on and on and on., but Im sure you got the picture . BED is a serious disorder. I think that it is linked to obesity. I think that Obesity should be classified in the DSM-IV with all the other eating disorders. Alcohol included. After all drug and alcoholism is listed and they are addictions. Obesity is an addiction to food. I am glad I found this website and Sunny’s blog. Today is the 1st day of the rest of my life. Today, I fight back. Today, I take back control of my life and my eating habits. And today, I learn to love myself more, stop putting myself down, and live .